8702100526
DETROIT FREE PRESS
870826
Wednesday, August 26, 1987
METRO FINAL CHASER
1D
MITCH ALBOM
SEE ALSO STATE EDITION 1D
Copyright (c) 1987, Detroit Free Press
MOLITOR'S STREAK MAKES EVERYBODY TOO JUMPY
I see where USA Today, journalism's answer to the phone book, has begun
previewing games for Paul Molitor and his incredible hitting streak.
Atop Tuesday's sports section, the newspaper ran small yellow boxes --
"Tonight," "Wednesday," "Thursday" -- detailing the scheduled pitchers, and
Molitor's stats against each. (This, by the way, was in addition to a huge
picture of Molitor on the front page of the paper. Which was accompanied by a
front-page story. Which fell just beneath the top news headline: "Summer's The
Ticket For Record Movie Year." And you thought USA Today wasn't a hard-core
newspaper.)
But wait, I figured. Why stop with the pitchers? After all, pitchers will
not be the major obstacles to Molitor's pursuit of Joe DiMaggio's record
56-game hitting streak. No way. Pitchers will be the easy part.
The hard part will be the media circus forming around Molitor, who has hit
safely in 39 straight. Every breath, every scratch, every burp will be
recorded and analyzed the closer he gets to the record. Batting practice will
be filmed. Balls will be collected and held for shipment to Cooperstown.
There will be nothing like it ever in the history of sports. Therefore,
as a public service, I give you my own preview of what will happen. This way
you won't have to miss any of those great movies USA Today was talking about:
He can't even go home again
GAME 40: Molitor cracks a double on his first at-bat against Cleveland,
pulling even with Ty Cobb's record of 40 straight games set in 1911. "How do
you feel?" he is asked afterward by a mob of reporters. "I'm real happy to
tie Ty, uh, Ty tie, tuh, tu-tu, well, you know." A story comes out that
Molitor has developed a stuttering problem.
GAME 42: Molitor loops a single against Minnesota to move within two games
of Pete Rose's streak (44). When Molitor returns to his locker, he finds
several reporters from People magazine sleeping inside it. "If you could be
any animal in the world. . . . " one of them begins. Molitor retreats to the
showers. Until morning.
GAME 44: The game is a complete sellout. Pete Rose is seen in the seats behind
home plate, chomping on a Nestle's Crunch bar each time Molitor takes a swing.
Despite the distraction, Molitor hits a home run in the seventh. He then asks
Rose if he can have a piece.
GAME 47: A double against Kansas City keeps the streak alive. Reporters invade
Molitor's hometown of St. Paul, Minn., which has changed its named to St.
Paulie, in honor of its most famous citizen. "He used to put air in his
bicycle tires right here," says a local gas station attendant. "I could tell
even then the boy was something special."
GAME 50: Barbara Walters scores a major coup by getting Molitor to agree to a
brief pre-game interview for her prime time special. The cameras roll. Walters
gazes soulfully into Molitor's eyes. "Pauwie," she asked, "have you ever
cwied?" The interview ends when Molitor cannot stop laughing. He then goes
4-for-5 against the Twins, and is still heard laughing on the way out to his
car.
GAME 52: A triple against Toronto extends the streak. Calls come from "The
Tonight Show," "The Letterman Show," "The Cosby Show," "The Rocky Horror
Picture Show," Eric Show and Showtime. Molitor poses for Time magazine with
DiMaggio, under the provocative headline: "WHO'S MISTER COFFEE NOW?"
The questions keep coming
GAME 55: Molitor electrifies the crowd by laying down a bunt single in the
eighth inning against Detroit to push the streak to the brink of history.
There are more reporters than fans inside County Stadium. Tickets are going
for $300 apiece. Molitor has to be taken off the field in an armored truck.
Questions are collected by a PR man. Molitor answers them on tape, which is
then played back to the media. The most popular questions: 1) What will you
eat for breakfast? 2) What will you eat for lunch? 3) What shoes will you
wear? 4) What will you eat for dinner? The answers: I don't know, I don't
know, the brown ones, I don't know.
GAME 56: The stadium is a dizzy, sweltering mass of humanity as Molitor,
hitless in his first three at-bats, comes to the plate with two outs in the
bottom of the ninth. Goodyear blimps are circling overhead. Helicopters hover
in between. Network television interrupts all programming, and the broadcast
is beamed around the world, including China, Australia, Iceland, Suriname and
the Virgin Islands. A voice booms over the stadium loudspeakers: "NUMBER 4
NOW AT BAT, WILL EVERYONE PLEASE JOIN IN PRAYER?" The sellout crowd rises in
unison. Police ring the field. Molitor take a few practice swings, then looks
up at the crowded sky. He remembers when he played baseball as a kid, the
simple joy of smacking a hit, running the bases and getting his uniform dirty.
He pauses to ponder that for a moment, and 50,000 flashbulbs explode in his
face. Blinking, he steps into the box, swings at three straight pitches and is
called out. "What the . . . ?" he says, still blinking. The book deal is
canceled. The movie deal is canceled. The designer-bat deal is canceled. His
agent jumps off the roof.
PAUL MOLITOR;BASEBALL;COLUMN;HUMOR;MEDIA;REACTION;RECORD