8702280473
DETROIT FREE PRESS
871207
Monday, December 07, 1987
METRO FINAL
1F
MITCH ALBOM
Copyright (c) 1987, Detroit Free Press
THESE NEW, STABLE LIONS STILL EMIT A FAINT ODOR
Wasn't that something? The way the Lions came back and slaughtered the
Rams, ran all over them, shut down their passing attack, scored four times in
the final two minutes? Who'd have believed that? Wasn't it something? Wasn't
it--
Oh.
You were there.
Thought I could fool you for a minute.
Let's see. What can I really tell you about the "new" Lions, supposedly
more stable now that Darryl Rogers has been reprieved as the coach. Stable?
Well. They stayed exactly the same as the weeks before. Lost, 37-16. I'd call
that stable.
Let's start with the good stuff:
Jim Arnold, the punter. Hell of a job.
So much for the good stuff.
The rest? Oooh. We had some doozies: There was cornerback Bobby Watkins,
who gave the Rams receivers respect. A lot of respect. In fact, it was as if
all game Watkins was saying to them: "I give you respect." The Rams receivers,
however, could not hear him, because they were always 20 yards away.
OK. That's not true. One time Henry Ellard was 40 yards away. That was the
play where Watkins nearly fell, Jim Everett threw a long pass, a terrible
pass really, and Ellard still had enough time to catch up to it, balance his
checkbook, do his Christmas shopping, study for a real estate license, then
catch it and sprint for a touchdown.
The mistakes keep coming
There were the half dozen or so dropped balls by Lions receivers,
proving to Chuck Long, once again, that it's no fun if you hit 'em in the
hands. Then again, Long didn't have the best of days. The name on the back of
his jersey might have been the description of his passes.
Wait. Don't go. There were the special teams, which gave up a 53-yard
kickoff return (as the Church Lady on TV says: "Isn't that special?").
There was a missed Eddie Murray field goal. A James Jones fumble on a
crucial fourth-quarter drive. The Rams' last field goal hit the crossbar and
went over.
Even the equipment is against us.
"Would you pay money to see this team?" someone asked Jones, in the
predictably morose locker room afterward.
"Would I pay money?" he said. "I guess that depended on what I wanted to
see."
Right. Good. A fresh way of looking at things. Who says fans pay to see a
winning team? A lot of folks like to shell out 15 bucks to watch punts.
Interceptions? You get your money's worth. Odd plays? How about that last
touchdown pass, Long to Pete Mandley in the final 30 seconds -- ruled no
good because Mandley went out of bounds and came back in? You don't see that
in Denver, do you?
There was even a fight near the end, and when the referees cleared the
bodies, they threw out "No. 93 of the Lions," Jerry Ball, which was
interesting, because Ball was on the sidelines the entire time. If he was
smart, he ignored the mistake and left anyhow.
Now, personally, I like this kind of stuff. Unfortunately, I don't pay for
tickets. Of those who did Sunday, 25 percent (more than 10,000 ticket-holders)
chose to waste the money and stay home anyhow, presumably to do something
important, like clean the fish tank.
And that is where we are. When owner William Ford cleared up the coaching
controversy last week, he pretty much took away the only thing left to talk
about.
I don't want to say the game was dull, but when the final gun sounded,
several people opened their eyes and said, "Huh? . . . Whazzat?"
That was a fast season
The good news, of course, is the Lions, now 2-10, are on track for the No.
1 pick in next year's draft. The bad news is, there's nobody out there that
could make that much difference.
"How difficult is it to keep saying the same things every week?" someone
asked Long.
"Well, the same things keep happening every week," he answered.
Well put. The fact is, football season here has become something to be
gotten through as quickly as possible. Would anyone really object if the Lions
called off their last three games and just concentrated on next year?
"What can you do?" someone asked Jones. "Anything to shake things up?"
"It's too late for something like that," he moaned, "unless you're gonna
fire 10 or 12 players at one time."
Don't tempt anybody.
Enough. We will not rehash what is wrong with the Lions here, because it
is Monday morning, and most of us feel lousy enough. Suffice it to say at one
point during Sunday's defeat, William Ford was spotted by the window of his
private box, his hands curled by his chin. It looked as if he was praying.
Then again, he might have been getting sick.
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