9102010775 DETROIT FREE PRESS 910823 Friday, August 23, 1991 METRO FINAL

SPT

1C Photo MITCH ALBOM Copyright (c) 1991, Detroit Free Press TIGERS POUR IT ON US INK-STAINED WRETCHES THE LIVE ALBOM: * I think it's time to give the Tigers a special award: Most Embarrassing Team To Sports Writers. * How many "experts" wrote them off as maybe the worst team in baseball during spring training? And here they are sneaking up on first place, sweeping teams like Chicago -- on the road! * I might be truly humbled by all this, had a certain Tigers pitcher not told me himself back in March, "Man, we s--k!" Even athletes are bad predictors. * Well, the U.S. Open tennis tournament begins next week, and GQ magazine has put Boris Becker on its cover. It's supposed to be a really nice photo. Then again, here are a few they rejected: * I don't know about you, but if I need a loan next year, I go to Cecil Fielder. * He hits 40 this season, they won't have trucks big enough to haul away his money. * Prediction: If Bo Jackson plays for the White Sox next month, a certain Kansas City doctor skips town in the middle of the night. * Gee, those Yankees really went on a tear after Don Mattingly cut his hair, didn't they? * And the Mets are sure having fun across town. New York is just one happy baseball place. * Meanwhile, Darryl Strawberry, former New Yorker, is such a hit in LA, they're thinking of reviving his old TV show "Good Times," in which he played J.J., under his stage name, Jimmy Walker. Darryl is . . . Dy-no-mite? * My thoughts on an Eric Lindros-for-Steve Yzerman deal? The Red Wings would make it. Quebec wouldn't. * If I were GM, I couldn't trade Yzerman. Every woman in the city would hate me. * OK. So the the Lions aren't ready for the Super Bowl. But aren't folks around here taking that exhibition loss to Kansas City a little too seriously? Hey. Winning those stupid games hasn't helped any. * Chet Lemon. Phone call. Chet Lemon. Phone call. * I admire Jack McCloskey, but he sure has this thing about signing other team's problems: William Bedford, Mark Aguirre, Orlando Woolridge, now Brad Sellers. Is that an All-Attitude Team or what? * Of course, James Edwards was considered a bad seed when he came here. And a mellow Aguirre has helped the Pistons win two championships. * But Jack, can Detroit cure everybody? * By the way, on the subject of basketball: What happened at the Pan Am Games is exactly why I oppose sending NBA players to the Olympics. Sure, the U.S. -- a virtual All-Star squad -- will beat the crap out of everyone in Barcelona. But you can bet, just like the Pan Am squad, they won't be staying in the Olympic village; they'll be in the fanciest hotels, on private buses, missing out on the whole camaraderie of the Games. Sorry. Experiencing the Olympics is more than eating in a foreign restaurant. * One more thing: Don't tell me that team shouldn't have a Piston on it. What? Detroit loses the title, suddenly it has no players? * Speaking of Cuba, bowling fans are sure glad those Pan Am Games are over! Now they can enjoy Fidel Castro's unique coverage of their sport, every week, right here in the Free Press, under his pen name, bowling writer Matt Fiorito. Nice writing, Matt Nice writing, Matt?