9002110578 DETROIT FREE PRESS 901103 Saturday, November 03, 1990 METRO FINAL

SPT

2B MITCH ALBOM the picks Copyright (c) 1990, Detroit Free Press SOME PISTONS MIGHT FIND PLACES ON CERTAIN NFL TEAMS Since Pistons season has everyone in this town crazy again, we might as well mix a little basketball in with the football this morning. If the Pistons played in the NFL, what teams would they be with? * Isiah Thomas: I see him with Houston, at quarterback, replacing Warren Moon. * Dennis Rodman: Wide receiver, LA Raiders. He already has the bandana. * Joe Dumars: Tailback, New Orleans. He could drive home. * Bill Laimbeer: I can't see him playing football. * Vinnie Johnson: I keep wondering why he isn't playing football. * John Salley: Wide receiver for Atlanta. He'd tell Jerry Glanville, "Yo! Coach. You're not that funny. You want funny? Listen to me." And now, this week's picks . . . * Washington 24, Lions 20: Eric Williams gets confused, lines up on the wrong side of the ball and sacks his own quarterback. Unfortunately, it is the only sack the Lions get all day. * Pittsburgh 35, Atlanta 23: Remember when the Steelers couldn't score a touchdown? * Dallas 21, NY Jets 17: Quick. Name me five players on either team. * Philadelphia 28, New England 14: The NFL this week ordered 2,100 terry-cloth bathrobes for the players. Make sure you send the Patriots some instructions. * Cincinnati 41, New Orleans 10: Bengals have been on the road so long, they dial 9 when they pick up their home phones. * Miami 30, Phoenix 7: I want to know how the Dolphins, who were really bad on defense, suddenly got so good on defense. And can they fax it to the Lions? * San Francisco 23, Green Bay 21: One of these weeks, Joe Montana, in the middle of his typical last-second heroics, is going to look up from the huddle and say, "What was that?" The gun. * Buffalo 28, Cleveland 21: Jim Kelly and Bernie Kosar skip the game to watch old films with Howard Schnellenberger. * Chicago 19, Tampa Bay 17: Wait a minute. Did I see Jim Harbaugh last week wearing a . . . headband? * Houston 33, LA Rams 30: The Rams couldn't contain Bubby Brister last Monday. Now they're saying, "Oh, great. Warren Moon next. Great. This is really a fun year." * Seattle 17, San Diego 10: Who cares? * Denver 26, Minnesota 21: You think Jerry Burns is paying for his own drinks these days? * LA Raiders 17, Kansas City 14: Black is back. * NY Giants 34, Indianapolis 13 (Monday night): Do the Colts have any quarterbacks left? * Record last week: 8-4. * Record vs. spread: 8-4. * Record for season: 70-32. * Season vs. spread: 55-46-1. * Best pick last week: San Francisco 24, Cleveland 17. 49ers won, 20-17. * Worst pick last week: Indianapolis 20, Miami 13. Dolphins won, 27-7.