9402090781 DETROIT FREE PRESS 941108 Tuesday, November 08, 1994 METRO FINAL

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1C MITCH ALBOM SEE ALSO METRO EDITION, Page 1C Copyright (c) 1994, Detroit Free Press THE HUDDLE Before we jump into our football foibles, the Huddle would like to salute George (I'm Huge In Every Way) Foreman, who is again the heavyweight boxing champion of the world after 20 years without the title. He gives hope to Lions fans. In fact, come on in here, George, you lovable blimp . . . move over, fellas, keep going, keep going -- you, on the end, take this walkie-talkie and we'll radio you when to stop -- OK, great. Now. Big hug everyone . . . HUDDLE UP! WHO'S IN THIS WEEK: Dave Krieg, Mel Gray, Warren Moon, Tyrone Wheatley, Dan Marino, the Mighty Ducks of Oregon, Barry Sanders (lifetime membership) and Brian, Royce, Ray and Jeff, the four guys who threw their names over the railing at the Pistons opener, asking for admittance. Way to keep your minds on the game, fellas. WHO'S OUT: Scott Mitchell's right hand, Scott Mitchell's left hand, whoever's teaching Mitchell the offense, Roosevelt Wagner, the Buffalo Bills, ref Bernie Kukar, and Michael Moorer. (Local hero. Nice guy. Dumbest late-round strategy I've ever seen.) Huddle. Remember us? Look, it's Erik Kramer, Rodney Peete and Andre Ware. You guys haven't come to gloat now that Mitchell's down, have you? No . . . (heh-heh) . . . (hee-hee) . . . Who, us? Hmm. Say, guys, I hear they're using Rodney's upcoming marriage in a new movie about your careers. A movie? About our careers? What's it called? "Three Funerals and a Wedding." Excuse me, Huddle, I'd like to clear my name. Why, it's Bernie Kukar, the referee who turned on his microphone after the Lions' onside kick Sunday and said, "The ball was recovered by the kicking team. Unfortunately, his feet were out of bounds." Look, I didn't mean anything. I said "unfortunately" to address the crowd. Hmm. In that case I'd like to get you in the Huddle. Thank you. Unfortunately, we don't accept boneheads. Shoo! Hey, Huddle. How about that Dave Krieg? He played a fine game. Shouldn't he get Lifetime Huddle Membership? Wait. The Lions won the game? Well, no. Krieg completed the final touchdown pass? No. Come back when you have a stronger case. YO, HUDDLE. FEED ME! Easy, George. Someone call Dunkin' Donuts. Hey, Huddle, Cornhuskers, No. 1, all right! Nice sentence structure. Are you an SEC grad? Question, Huddle: With all their losses, hasn't the luster been taken off U-M and MSU's seasons? You mean they're still playing? Hey, Huddle. On Sunday, Buffalo's Don Beebe was knocked cold by a New York defender, and Chicago's Tom Waddle was knocked cold by a Tampa defender. Isn't that shocking? Yeah. A Tampa player hits that hard? LET'S GO TO THE MAILBAG . . . Dear Huddle, You sound like a complete dweeb when you insult a Happy Valley deity, Joe Paterno. Why don't you swim in Lake St. Clair with cement water wings. -- Booker in Dearborn. So, Booker, you're out on parole? Dear Huddle, I think I should be in the Huddle because 1) You are the coolest. 2) Penn St. kicks royal butt! -- Mike Gwizdak, Westland. P.S.: Call me, I have comments and questions. I'm sure you do, Mike. Unfortunately, I'm due back on planet Earth. Excuse me, Mr. Huddle sir. Lou Holtz? Look, we already told you, you can't get in on a week you didn't play. Well, we have a big game coming up against Florida State, and I'm afraid we might get . . . Slaughtered? Yes. So for luck, I thought, maybe, you know . . . Oh, all right, Lou. Take a spot next to George Foreman . . . There you go . . . Hey, George, can you swat that fly on Holtz's nose? WHUMP! Thanks. Somebody pick Lou up, will ya? Oh please, oh please, oh please, your NFL poll! Get up, Al Davis. You're embarrassing yourself. TOP BOTTOM 1. San Francisco 20. Lions 2. Dallas 27. Cincinnati 3. Philadelphia 28. Youngstown State 4. Kansas City 29. Tampa Bay Hey, Huddle. Don't look now, but Chuck Long is one hit away from being the Lions' starting quarterback. I knew I shouldn't have thrown out all those old stories I wrote about him. Yo, Huddle, shouldn't we worry about all the concussions week after week in the NFL? I don't know. Let's ask Foreman. He gets hit in the head for a living. George, are concussions dangerous? NO MAN SHOULD BE HIT BY A . . . CHERRY PIE. I LOVE CHERRY PIE. HERE WE GO! ALI, ALI, STAND STILL, ALI! PRAISE THE LORD. PEANUT BUTTER! RRRRRR . . . aahhh . . . (plop.) Hmm. I'd say we have nothing to worry about. Got a reason you should be in the Huddle? Write The Huddle, c/o Detroit Free Press Sports, 321 W. Lafayette, Detroit 48226, or fax 1-313-222-5983. DLIONS; FOOTBALL; COLUMN; ANALYSIS; GAME; TEAM; DETROIT;Lions