9701030331
DETROIT FREE PRESS
970125
Saturday, January 25, 1997
METRO FINAL
1B
MITCH ALBOM Free Press Sports Writer
Copyright (c) 1997, Detroit Free Press
MITCH'S PICK: THE PATRIOTS
DON'T BELIEVE IT? READ ON
Oh, Curt. You sad, misguided soul. How can you pick the Green Bay Packers
to win this Super Bowl when everyone knows the Patriots are a lock?
(Ed. note: Mitch Albom is lying through his teeth. He does not believe
the Patriots will win.)
The Patriots are the superior team, Curt. They have a better running game
and a coach who can win the Big One. What's the matter? Can't your
114-year-old eyes see that?
(Ed. note: Never mind the age jokes. Only a fool would believe what Albom
is saying.)
Curt, the Patriots are not only going to cover the spread, they're going to
win. Won't you feel stupid?
(The truth is, Albom is the one feeling stupid. He lost the year-long NFL
prediction competition with Curt Sylvester, and was forced to defend New
England in this debate. Albom is ashamed and humiliated. Look at him squirm.)
Curt, the Patriots are the sleeper that becomes your worst nightmare.
Nobody is giving them a chance. Same thing happened with the Giants in 1991.
Remember, Curt?
(He goes with the 1991 story. How pathetic.)
I remember, Curt. You picked the Buffalo Bills, along with the rest of the
country? And I picked the Giants.
(Albom chose the Giants because he lost the picks competition again.)
You were wrong. I was right. And it's going to happen again, Curt. You are
blinded by the cheese on your head. By the way, there were some mice asking
for you this morning.
(Here he goes with the personal insults, a lame attempt to disguise his
pathetic pick.)
The fact is, nobody is giving Curtis Martin credit. Nobody is giving the
Patriots' secondary credit. Nobody is giving Drew Bledsoe credit.
(This is sad. Albom himself wrote a column in yesterday's paper saying
Bledsoe wasn't ready to win. Is there no end to his shameful lies?)
Also, if you give Bill Parcells two weeks to prepare for a game, you might
as well tie your shoelaces together. He will find a way to trip you.
(He's trying to impress us with metaphors.)
Curt, I will not sink to your level of character assassination, even
though I did hear a story about you, a stripper, a papaya and a goldfish bowl.
(Note: This is false. There was no papaya.)
All I want to say is, Curt, for a football writer, I'm surprised you
haven't done a little more homework and a little less home brew.
(Here comes the prediction. At this point, Albom is weeping.)
The Patriots will shock the football world . . .
(Geez, he's laying it on thick.)
. . . and whip the Packers.
(And elephants can fly.)
Final score: Pats 24, Pack 20.
(Packers 20, Pats 6.)
And remember, Curt, don't come crawling to me next year for forgiveness.
(Albom is withdrawing from the picks competition, before he humiliates
himself beyond repair.)
THIS ELECTRONIC VERSION MAY DIFFER SLIGHTLY FROM THE PRINTED ARTICLE.
FOOTBALL; PREDICTION; SUPER BOWL; PATRIOTS; PACKERS