9501190756
DETROIT FREE PRESS
950524
Wednesday, May 24, 1995
METRO FINAL CHASER
1E
MITCH ALBOM
SEE ALSO METRO FINAL EDITION PAGE 1E
Copyright (c) 1995, Detroit Free Press
SERIES LOOKS LIKE PIT BULLS VS. POODLES
In an effort to bond with our hockey friends from California, let's try
this exercise at home:
Look quickly over your left shoulder.
Now quickly over your right.
Now left, now right, now left, right,
leftrightleftright . . .
Congratulations. You now know how a San Jose Shark feels.
What was the combined score from Games 1 and 2 of this playoff series?
Detroit 12, San Jose 2? That's not hockey, that's target practice. One rumor
says the Sharks left town on a plane Tuesday night.
A bigger rumor is that they were here at all.
"I can only call this game a dogfight between a pit bull and a poodle,"
said San Jose's Jamie Baker after the Wings cleaned up, 6-2.
"I know this: I must figure out a way to stop the pucks they shoot," said
an exhausted Arturs Irbe, the Sharks' goalie. Of course, saying you have to
stop the Wings' shooting is like saying you have to figure out a way to keep
those mosquitoes from biting.
Shots on goal Tuesday?
Detroit 46, San Jose 17.
Who'd have thunk it? In one year, playing the Sharks has gone from a
nightmare to a pajama party.
Game 1 was a shutout. And Game 2 was a parade of Red Wings scoring stars:
Yzerman, Fedorov, Coffey, Ciccarelli. They raised their sticks and laughed
and hugged and patted each other's heads. All that was missing was the Jiffy
Pop.
"To be honest, we're kind of disappointed in allowing those two goals in
the third period," Darren McCarty said. "In fact, we're kind of disgusted with
that."
Hmm. Imagine how San Jose feels.
Don't blame Irbe
How can I describe the first two periods Tuesday night? Certain words leap
to mind, such as . . . manslaughter. This wasn't lopsided, it was completely
turned over.
San Jose was swamped. Poor Irbe. He was like the first guy on the Falkland
Islands to look through his binoculars. "Whoa . . . what's all THIS?"
There were Wings to the left of him. Wings to the right of him. Wings on
top of him. Wings in his net. Dino (I'm A Pest, Sue Me) Ciccarelli had six
shots on Irbe in the first period alone. Sergei Fedorov put one puck past him
and then, for variety, put one through him. Paul Coffey left him looking. Doug
Brown beat him on a shorthanded breakaway.
Here's all you need to know about Tuesday. The Wings were ahead, 6-0, when
Bruce Martyn, the legendary Detroit announcer, observed that Irbe was "playing
a pretty good game."
And he was right. There was simply no stopping Detroit. Certainly not with
the lackluster effort the rest of this San Jose team put together. I thought
Sharks were supposed to show their teeth, not their gums. San Jose left pucks
dangling. It was slow getting back. It could muster no offense. In the second
period, it didn't manage a shot until 12 minutes had gone by. Not a single
shot?
Hey, Sharks. The phrase is Die Hard, not Over Easy. We keep hearing how this
San Jose team preserves its strength during blowouts, saving it for the next
close game. Unfortunately, the Sharks' next close game might be on the golf
course.
"This team has so much talent, it's truly amazing," said Mike Vernon, the
Wings' goalie, who, thankfully, doesn't get paid by the save in these
playoffs, since he has only faced 32 shots in two games -- or about one
period's worth for San Jose. "I'll tell you, I played on some good teams in
Calgary, but nothing compared to this. We can do so many things. It's really
nice to sit there and watch it."
Maybe the Sharks feel the same way -- since they often do the same thing. I
don't want to say San Jose was crushed Tuesday. I will say there's a Wellness
Plan advertisement on the boards at Joe Louis Arena, and by the end of the
game, several Sharks had written their names and addresses beneath it.
Another short series
Now, OK. Before anyone goes nuts over the Wings' success, please
remember: This is what the Wings should be doing. The Sharks are a rival in
shadow only. In real life, they haven't beaten Detroit yet this season, and
until the third period Tuesday night, the last goal they'd scored in Joe
Louis Arena was back when Isiah Thomas was still a Piston.
The fact is, the Wings were supposed to beat Dallas handily, and they are
supposed to do the same with San Jose. This is not to diminish their doing it
-- because teams such as Calgary and Quebec weren't able to do what they were
supposed to. But the real test of a team as good as Detroit should not be
against the San Jose Sharks. It should be against whomever they face in the
Stanley Cup finals.
In the meantime, here's hoping they continue taking care of business. And
here's hoping that Irbe has a nice warm bed to go home to, because, as Darren
McCarty said after the game: "People think we're extra motivated against San
Jose because of what happened last year. They think that keeps us going out
there, and piling it on.
"But the truth is, we're such perfectionists, we want to bury everybody."
Hmm. Sounds good to us.
Off they go, to the land of milk and honey, Northern California, where the
Sharks are rumored to actually win a game now and then. So long. Godspeed. It
says here this series will not go beyond a Game 5. But we'll see.
In the meantime, let us finish with these words of wisdom:
To the Wings: Keep that big picture in mind.
And to the Sharks: Chiropractors will do wonders for those cricks in your
necks.
COLUMN; HOCKEY; SAN JOSE SHARKS; DREDWINGS; HUMOR;Red Wings